{"id":599,"date":"2009-04-25T09:48:24","date_gmt":"2009-04-25T14:48:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/?p=599"},"modified":"2009-04-25T09:49:37","modified_gmt":"2009-04-25T14:49:37","slug":"the-old-biker","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/2009\/04\/25\/the-old-biker\/","title":{"rendered":"The Old Biker"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A great one from Ernie! \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n<p>A crusty old biker out on a long summer ride in the country pulls up to a tavern in the middle of nowhere, parks his bike and walks inside. As he passes through the swinging doors, he sees a sign hanging over the bar:<\/p>\n<p>COLD BEER: $2.00<br \/>\nHAMBURGER: $2.25<br \/>\nCHEESEBURGER: $2.50<br \/>\nCHICKEN  SANDWICH : $3.50<br \/>\nHAND JOB: $50.00<\/p>\n<p>Checking his wallet to be sure he has the necessary payment, the ole&#8217; biker  walks up to the bar and beckons to the exceptionally attractive female bartender who is serving drinks to a couple of sun-wrinkled farmers.<br \/>\nShe glides down behind the bar to the ole biker.<br \/>\n&#8220;Yes?&#8221; she inquires with a wide, knowing smile, &#8220;may I help you?&#8221;<br \/>\nThe ole biker leans over the bar, &#8220;I was wondering young lady,&#8221; he whispers, &#8220;are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?&#8221;<br \/>\nShe looks into his eyes with that wide smile and purrs &#8220;Why yes, yes, I sure am&#8221;.<br \/>\nThe ole&#8217; biker leans closer and into her left ear whispers softly, <strong>&#8220;Well, wash your hands real good, cause I want a cheeseburger&#8221;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/2009\/04\/25\/the-old-biker\/\">http:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/2009\/04\/25\/the-old-biker\/<\/a><strong><br \/>\n<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The ole biker leans over the bar, &#8220;I was wondering young lady,&#8221; he whispers, &#8220;are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[367,1711,90],"tags":[1705,726,727,1707,1704,1096,1700,303,1698,1709,132,1706,1699,1702,1708,101,646,1331,1703,1701,757,1710],"class_list":["post-599","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-food","category-motorbike-car","category-sex","tag-attractive","tag-barman","tag-bartender","tag-barwomen","tag-bekons","tag-biker","tag-cheeseburger","tag-chicken","tag-cold-beer","tag-ear","tag-ernie","tag-female","tag-hamburger","tag-hand","tag-hand-job","tag-job","tag-motorbike","tag-ole","tag-payment","tag-sandwich","tag-wallet","tag-whisper"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/599","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=599"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/599\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":601,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/599\/revisions\/601"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=599"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=599"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=599"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}