A great one from Edel:<\/p>\n
I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven.<\/strong><\/p>\n I asked them, ‘If I sold my house and my car, had a big jumble sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?’<\/strong><\/p>\n ‘NO!’ the children answered.<\/strong><\/p>\n ‘If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?’<\/strong><\/p>\n Again, the answer was ‘No!’ By now I was starting to smile.<\/strong><\/p>\n ‘Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave sweeties to all the children, Again, they all answered ‘No!’. I was just bursting with pride for them.<\/strong><\/p>\n I continued, ‘ Then how can I get into heaven?’<\/strong><\/p>\n A six year-old boy shouted out <\/strong><\/p>\n “YUV GOTTA BE FuKN’ DEAD……….”<\/span><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" A great one from Edel: I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. I asked them, ‘If I sold my house and my car, had a big jumble sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1736,3,471,318],"tags":[1951,950,1443,658,1981,40,532,18,64,1737,1970,1740,1954,1739],"class_list":["post-612","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-heaven-religion","category-irish","category-kids","category-religion","tag-animals","tag-candy","tag-chapel","tag-church","tag-dead","tag-edel","tag-garden","tag-heaven","tag-ireland","tag-jumble-sale","tag-kids","tag-pride","tag-school","tag-sweeties"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/612","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=612"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/612\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":621,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/612\/revisions\/621"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=612"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=612"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=612"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nand loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?’<\/strong><\/p>\n