{"id":68,"date":"2008-03-05T23:19:35","date_gmt":"2008-03-06T04:19:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/?p=68"},"modified":"2009-02-04T12:27:08","modified_gmt":"2009-02-04T17:27:08","slug":"calling-in-sick","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/2008\/03\/05\/calling-in-sick\/","title":{"rendered":"Calling in sick"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>From Norm:<br \/>\nA woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she is not feeling well.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;<em>What&#8217;s the matter?<\/em>&#8221; he asks.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;<em>I have a case of anal glaucoma,<\/em>&#8221; she says in a weak voice.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;<em>What the hell is anal glaucoma<\/em>?&#8221;<\/p>\n<h3>&#8220;I can&#8217;t see my ass coming into work today.&#8221;<\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/2008\/03\/05\/calling-in-sick\"><span id=\"sample-permalink\">http:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/2008\/03\/05\/<span id=\"editable-post-name\" title=\"Click to edit this part of the permalink\">calling-in-sick<\/span><\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>From Norm: A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she is not feeling well. &#8220;What&#8217;s the matter?&#8221; he asks. &#8220;I have a case of anal glaucoma,&#8221; she says in a weak voice. &#8220;What the hell is anal glaucoma?&#8221; &#8220;I can&#8217;t see my ass coming into work [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[266,39,102],"tags":[1472,1416,268,1473,1955,1474,267,1475,1943],"class_list":["post-68","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ill","category-women","category-work","tag-anal","tag-boss","tag-bum","tag-glaucoma","tag-ill","tag-norm","tag-sick","tag-stay-at-home","tag-work"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/68","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=68"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/68\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":487,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/68\/revisions\/487"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=68"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=68"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.timony.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=68"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}