Helga’s Diary on a Cruise Ship

A funny one from Edel:
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DEAR DIARY – DAY 1

All packed for the cruise ship — all my nicest dresses, swimsuits, short sets. Really, really exciting.
Our local Red Hat chapter decided on this “all-girls” trip.
It will be my first one, – and I can’t wait!
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DEAR DIARY – DAY 2

Entire day at sea, beautiful. Saw whales and dolphins. Met the Captain today — seems like a very nice man.
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DEAR DIARY – DAY 3

At the pool today. Did some shuffleboard, hit golf balls off the deck. Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner. Felt honored and had a wonderful time. He is very attractive and attentive.
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DEAR DIARY – DAY 4

Won $800.00 in the ship’s casino. Captain asked me to have dinner with him in his own cabin. Had a scrumptious meal complete with caviar and champagne. He asked me to stay the night, but I declined. Told him I could not be unfaithful to my husband.
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DEAR DIARY – DAY 5

Pool again today. Got sunburned, and I went inside to drink at piano-bar, stayed there for rest of day. Captain saw me, bought me several large drinks.
Really is quite charming. Again asked me to visit his cabin for the night. Again I declined. He told me, if I did not let him have his way with me, he would sink the ship… I was shocked.
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DEAR DIARY – DAY 6
Today I saved 1600 lives.
.
.
.
.
.
Twice.

13 / February / 2011  marriage, sex, women 

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