The Dole

From Edel, I think this joke came from Amerika as it mentions welfare (which they don’t call it that in Ireland) and someone modified it for their Irish friend:

At the dole office in New Ross a local traveller walked in to pick up his cheque.
He marched straight up to the counter and said, ‘Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I’d really rather have a job.’

The social worker behind the counter said, ‘Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter.

You’ll have to drive around in his 2007 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of your clothes.

Because of the long hours, meals will be provided.
You’ll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips.
This is rather awkward to say but you will also have, as part of your job assignment, to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20’s and has a rather strong sex drive.

A two-bedroom loft type apartment with plasma TV, stereo, bar, etc. located above the garage, will be designated for your sole use and the salary is ˆ200,000 a year.’

The Traveller just plain wide-eyed, said, ‘ you’re bullshittin’ me!’

The social worker said, ‘ Yeah, well you started it.’

http://www.timony.com/jokes/2008/07/05/the-dole/

5 / July / 2008  irish, tasteless, work 
  • 1. thejoker  |  March 16th, 2009 at 12:18 pm

    And the same version from Raz!

    At the dole office in New Ross a Traveller walked in to pick up his cheque. He marched straight up to the counter and said,
    ‘Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I’d really rather have a job.’

    The social worker behind the counter said, ‘Your timing is excellent.We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You’ll have to drive around in his 2007 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of your clothes.

    Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You’ll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say but you will also have, as part of your job assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20’s and has a rather strong sex drive. A two-bedroom loft type apartment with plasma TV, stereo, bar, etc located above the garage, will be designated for your sole use and the salary is EUR200,000 a year.’

    The traveller just plain wide-eyed, said,
    ‘You’re bullshittin’ me!’
    The social worker said, ‘Yeah, well. You started it.’

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