An elderly man is stopped by the police around 1 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night.
The man replies, "I am going to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body".
The officer then asks, "Really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?"
The man replies, "My wife."
This is cute..........even if you are a democrat or republican.
George Bush was out jogging one morning along the parkway when he tripped, fell over the bridge railing and landed in the creek below.
Before the Secret Service guys could get to him, 3 kids who were fishing pulled him out of the water. He was so grateful he offered the kids whatever they wanted.
The first kid said, 'I want to go to Disney World & Dubya said, 'No problem, I'll take you there on Air Force One.'
The second kid said, 'I want a new pair of Nike Air Jordan shoes.
Dubya said, 'I'll get them for you and even have Michael Jordan sign them.'
The third kid said, ' I want a motorized wheelchair with a built in TV and stereo headset.'
George was a little perplexed by this and said, 'But you don't look like you're handicapped.