All those Jokes that people send me All those crappy jokes that people e-mail me

30Sep/090

Coincidence or not?

Funny one from Jeannie!

2007 - Chinese year of the Chicken - Bird Flu Pandemic devastates parts of Asia

2008 - Chinese year of the Horse - Equine Influenza decimates Australian racing

2009 - Chinese year of the Pig - Swine Flu Pandemic kills hundreds of pigs around the globe.

Has any one else noticed this???!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It gets worse........ next year......

15Sep/090

Catholic Education

From Edel:

Little Zachary was doing quite badly in math. His parents had tried everything. Tutors, mentors, flash cards, Special learning Centers. In short, everything they could think of to help his math.

Finally, in a last ditch effort, they took Zachary down and enrolled him in the local Catholic school. After the first day, little Zachary came home with a very serious look on his face. He didn't even kiss his mother hello. Instead, he went straight to his room and started studying. Books and papers were spread out all over the room and little Zachary was hard at work.

His mother was amazed She called him down to dinner. To her shock, the minute he was done, he marched back to his room without a word, and in no time, he was back hitting the books as hard as before. This went on for some time, day after day, while the mother tried to understand what made all the difference.

Finally, little Zachary brought home his report card. He quietly laid it on the table, went up to his room and hit the books. With great
trepidation, his Mom looked at it and to her great surprise Little Zachary got an 'A' in math. She could no longer hold her curiosity.

She went to his room and said, 'Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?'
Little Zachary looked at her and shook his head, no.
'Well, then,' she replied, 'Was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms?'
Little Zachary looked at her and said,

'On the first day of school when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren't fooling around.'

9Sep/090

GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa:

half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful.

Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe:

well developed and open to trade, especially for someone of real value..

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain:

very hot, relaxed, and convinced of her own beauty.

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece:

gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain:

with a glorious and all conquering past.

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel:

has been through war, doesn't make the same mistakes twice, takes care of business.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada : self-
preserving, but open to meeting new people.

After 70, she becomes Tibet:

wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages, an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge.

GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN

Between 1 and 90, a man is like Iran , ruled by nuts.

THE END.

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